20 Dec Love is the Fire: A Path of Love Staff Member Shares His Experience
For one year now I have been feeling an urge to share what life puts me through as I witness a lot of unawareness around me and non-sense behaviors. Our generation has somehow lost the sense of why we act or do things, we lost the senses and our ability to trust them, and we lost our essence of love. So here are the first lines about these last 2 powerful weeks in Verona and Amsterdam.
Lately I met my Julie…no words, I simply surrender to what is. A tender and wild energetic creature at the same time drowned to me…a benediction. With no doubt though if we had met earlier I would have completely freaked out and run away in fear, too scared of losing myself. I can’t speak for her but I know she would also have not been interested in me before. Both of us were not in our essence, both of us were chasing demons, both of us were hurt kids protecting ourselves, looking at the outside to compensate what was missing. One was missing his masculine, the other her feminine. Fortunately life drew us individually on a path where step-by-step we were coming back home. Each of us taking responsibility for who we are, owning our dark sides and bringing them into light, filling them up with love. Because what else to do? How could we love someone else if we had not brought compassion and love to who we are?
Around us, there are too many examples of friends or friends of friends getting married (or sometimes wanting to get married then canceling) and breaking the marriage because they are not happy. As many examples of people breaking into life on a railway checking the boxes of university, jobs, apartments, marriage, bank loans, babies to finally discover they are not happy and blaming the other for the unhappiness instead of looking at their own barriers, people running away from their family and traveling far away to hopefully live a life that would save them from that unhappiness, people pleasing people to be loved, people being strong for others to be appreciated, people sacrificing their life for others because of so-called traditions or conditionings…and so on. Life is showing me that there is a huge demand and urge for love, real love, because happiness can only take place in loving environment where hearts are opened. It does not really matter where you are, how many palm trees there are around, how many loving kids you have, how many cars are stored in your garage, how big is your house. Happiness is where peace is and peace is a by product of an open heart.
Last week Julie and I, we walked together the Path of Love in Verona. Very scary and deeply confronting to go through such a brutal and deep process with your partner. Beautiful and painful at the same time. But I realized it was a gift to be able to ground our relationship in this place of trust. A week to feel…feel the grief, the anger, the injustice, the sadness, the fears, the pain we carry in our deepest crevices and surrender to whatever comes. Normally we are scared to confront, to honestly evaluate ourselves, we are scared to lose the person we love, to be rejected, abandoned, we are scared to feel the pain so we repress it and it aggravates. Then you know the story, you find ways to evacuate, you drink, you eat, you become unsatisfied, you engage in brutal things for yourself, you compete, you fight, you damage yourself. The Path of Love process gave us the chance to ground our personal homework in a clever and natural way, to bring up new revelations about ourselves, new discoveries, newly exposed layers of our personalities to grow up and share together to each other. I am grateful.
I am an idealist and had not realized before how love was a daily work of putting light and love onto our fears. I find it crucial to learn to walk alone first, to be able to enjoy ourselves. Then only maybe if life brings someone to you may you walk side by side. Love is something you have to own by burning the shit out of your mind so you can be and love as much as you are.
Love is the fire.
Quentin Vignaud is a Path of Love Graduate, and Staffed Path of Love in Verona, Italy in November 2019.